I was watching The Steve Harvey Talk Show one day and the topic was about finding a man. I flipped the channel and there was a newly married Christian couple that wrote a book on how they waited until marriage to consummate their relationship. Again I flipped the channel, and a famous actress and her pastoral husband, were promoting their book on how they remained celibate until marriage. I was annoyed.
So many people are writing self-help books and filming vlogs to showcase their path to marriage. They all have the same mantra: “I waited for God to reveal to me my husband or wife. If it can happen to me, it can happen to you too.” It’s all fluff. I wish there were more books or people promoting how to optimize your single life, instead of talking about it as if it’s the plague. What kind of message are we sending to young girls? Young girls need to know that marriage is not the goal in life and that their worth is not dependent upon a ring and a man. There are so many things single women can do to live their best life. It’s okay to want to be married, but don’t let that desire blind you from the good that comes from being single.
God did craft men into species that aren’t meant to be alone, but he also crafted men who are meant to share his word through their singled life. Marriage will come when the time is right, but until then, women need to create their own life clock and not listen to societies’. Sex before marriage is not of God, but as Christians, we are supposed to correct in love, not in boastfulness. The message that needs to be spread is that we are to use both our single and married life as a showcase for God’s grace and mercy.